Inevitable
by Mikayla Gawain
Summary: ""John, I know I say this a lot, but I still miss you so much." - Dave x John Sadstuck


Inspired by Anberlin's song "Inevitable"~  
Yeah, this is a seriously off-shoot timeline of Homestuck, no mention of Sburb. But sometimes things might be better experimented that way? That's what this was- an experiment. SO DON'T FREAK AT ME FOR NOT INCLUDING THE GAME.

WHICH YOU ALSO JUST LOST

now enjoy =]

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**Inevitable** – Dave and John

Your name is Dave Strider.

After a long day at work, you drove straight out to a place you hadn't been in quite some time. It was mid-autumn, and the trees along the road you drove were an explosion of colors. It kind of reminded you of a bunch of kindergarteners spattering paint on a canvas, throwing on ample amounts of yellow and deep reds around and don't forget about that orange.

Even though it was so cool outside, you always drove with the windows wide open. You enjoyed the feeling of the wind blowing in on your face and ruffling your hair. It always had its strange way of calming you down like it was blowing straight through your skin and cleansing your troubles.

You finally came to the crossroad after miles on the same road. Signal, mirror, fade, check, and slowdown: that cadence was always in the back of your mind as you took that corner. There was never any traffic out here, but you made sure to execute it exactly like that. It would be the time that you didn't do it you'd get hit by an anomaly.

It wasn't the time for that. You couldn't delay yourself. It's rude to keep a person waiting. You stepped on the gas a little as you went up the hill. After you got over it, the trees faded and opened up into a golden country side.

You were almost there now. You could see that familiar tree and fence on the horizon. Soon you were going to turn off the road on those dirt tracks you left from all of the times you'd been there before. You were amazed when you got there that they still were so defined. Then again you had been here quite often, and you weren't the only person to stop here. That little hillside overlooking the fields of some farmer was not a private place, but it was treated as one.

The phone in your pocket suddenly vibrated as you pulled to a stop amidst the tall grass. You put the car in park and turned off the ignition before you pulled that expensive piece of glitching shit from your pants and checked your messages.

2 missed calls, 2 new voicemails and 3 unread messages. You skipped the voicemails and the calls and went straight to Pesterchum.

There were two messages from Rose.

-tentacleTherapist began pestering turntechGodhead at 11:13 -

TT: Let me know when you're leaving work.

TT: Okay?

-tentacleTherapist ceased pestering turntechGodhead at 11:14-

And there was a message from Jade.

-gardenGnostic began pestering turntechGodhead at 13:46-

GG: dave, please call me when you get this message!

-gardenGnostic ceased pestering turntechGodhead at 13:46-

You didn't reply to either of them and tossed your phone into the passenger's seat. They didn't know your work schedule much like you didn't because your boss often changed it like he did his shirt. They were usually good about just waiting for your response whenever you decided to give it to them. So you'd just get back to them after your next engagement, and they'd be none the wiser.

Except maybe for Rose. You always figured she kept a tab on you; she always had an idea of when she could talk to you or know what you were doing. It was either serious attention to pattern, or she was a psychic. You wouldn't dwell on it too much.

You got out of the car, not forgetting the unopened can of Pepsi in the drink holder, and walked up the worn path up the hill that rested in the cornfield with an unsettling feeling in your stomach. Up at the top was a rickety old fence with peeling paint. It seemed so out of place up there, but you wouldn't have it any other way. It was such a special place to you.

Around the other side of the tree, John was waiting for you just like you expected him to be, overlooking the oceans of fields. John was the only person who could make you break out of your cool kid façade when you were younger. You had pretty much grown out of it by then, but it was still nice to see him again and let yourself go a little.

You quietly approached where he was, an apprehensive smile tugged across your face as you looked down at him. Before anything was said you took off your shades, the very same Ben Stiller shades that he'd given you for your thirteenth birthday. You hardly ever took them off then, and you still wore them even now.

After all of these years, you couldn't bring yourself to look at the world through just your own eyes. You liked the idea that you were looking at the world the way John showed you, with all of the irony and darkness. Besides it hid your eyes from the world. No one could get inside of your soul. You weren't letting anyone else in other than John.

Your soul was absolutely tainted with dorky Egbert, and you've never given a single fuck about it. That's the reason you were willing to remove your shades in his presence.

"Hey, Egbert," you said.

He looked up at you with his big framed eyes and you watched the excitement bubble from within his body like a hot spring. He smiled that characteristically bucktooth smile that you had always loved and he exclaimed your name and ran to greet you.

At least, that's what you wish would have happened. Unfortunately, he kept right on where he was and stayed there. Nothing was said.

You looked down at your feet as you went right into explaining yourself. "Look, I know it's been a while since I last saw you. My schedule has been such a mess lately with my work and all. I've really been meaning to make time for you, but it just hasn't been going the way I've wanted. I'm sorry."

The wind blew as if responding for him. You took a breath and sat down next to him and looked down at the warm can in your hand.

"I brought your favorite drink," you said, fidgeting with it. "I know that your dad never liked when I bought it for you in the past. Then again, your dad never has really liked me, has he?"

You stared at the can in silence. You were so thirsty. "You don't mind if I take a swig before I hand it over?" you asked. John never cared; he was always nice about sharing with you.

The can cracked when you broke the seal, letting out a hiss as it began to carbonate. It sprayed a bit on your hand. You absently licked the bubbles away before bringing the can to your lips.

"I promise I'm not going to drink the whole thing like last time," you said reassuringly. The last time you had gotten really carried away and drank the entire thing. You weren't going to make the same mistake twice, especially when there was that tension. So you had a few lukewarm gulps before setting the pop next to him.

As much as he might have wanted to, he wouldn't touch it.

It was deadly quiet for a while. Silence hung in the air like a fog, and it made you panic. So you started to talk again, about how your boss was a pain in the ass, and how your sleep schedule was all messed up because of it. Then you talked about how your brother was sick and you'd been helping take care of him. John just listened.

Then you went and asked, "Do you remember when we were just kids?"

Those days were so long ago now. You used to just sit around and talk for hours on the computer with him, about the stupidest things. About the movies that he liked and things like that. You threw out some of your interests, and you often rapped at him. Sometimes it was more to just get a reaction out of him than anything else. You got bored a lot when you were a kid. You didn't have time to be bored anymore.

A casual autumn breeze rustled the leaves in the tree above you. A few of them caught onto the air and fell in swirls around where you were sitting. You closed your eyes and smiled as you let the wind envelope you.

"Yeah, it kind of felt like this," you mumbled absent-mindedly. "Breezy with hardly a care in the world"

When everything started to change, when life really started, John was your only sanctuary. After your parents died, your Bro decided to get out of Texas and move to Washington before you started high school. Somehow you ended up in the same city and town as John, so you guys started high school together.

You were never any good in school because it bored you to the lowest reaches of hell. You failed classes to be ironic and cool. It made your bro pretty disappointed. You never wanted to hear any of what he had to say about it, so you would always go hang out with John. You spent so much time with him. A lot of it was spent right where you were sitting right then. You guys wouldn't hang out at either of your houses often because it was either strife or cake.

When you were fifteen, the one time you failed an important test so completely and thoroughly as to the point where it was as though you didn't even take it, your brother flipped some serious shit. You knew he didn't know how to raise a kid, let alone how to groom his little brother to be a "successful shade-wearing dude", and you didn't really have much to say when your lip was swollen and bleeding.

When John saw it, you'd never seen him so worried. "Dave, what happened!?" he exclaimed. You couldn't lie to him. You told him how it all went down and he took care of you.

He always took care of you.

For John's seventeenth birthday, you didn't have enough money to get him anything. You had tried to save enough money to do something really special for him, but because your bro got laid off, you were the only income for the Strider household. So you showed up to John's house that night with a flimsy card you made with printer paper and color pencils. He didn't know you'd be stopping over.

As you walked up to the door, you were freaking out about how stupid you'd look for giving him just a card. A best friend should have been able to pull together something better than what you were going to give him. When you went to ring the doorbell it sounded like something was thumping around in there like a person was running frantically. Then the door flew open and John was standing there in his pajamas and trying to catch his breath.

His eyes were kind of puffy, too. Like he'd been crying or something.

You found yourself blinking behind your shades. It seriously caught you off guard. He really beat you to the punch. So much in fact you let an "Uhm" slip out. Also he actually kind of looked like shit for someone having a birthday.

John spoke so fast. "I-I thought you were Dad coming home early, but I heard the base f-from your music and I looked outside - and your car! W-what are you doing here? Don't you have to work tonight?" His voice sounded like he was about to break down sobbing.

You decided not to ask, collecting yourself. "Whoa, calm down, man. You think I'd skip out on your birthday? Weak."

He looked like a load got lifted off of him then. He smiled and stepped out of the way and ushered you inside. One of his fantastically horrible movies was about to start. He'd set up one hours before to watch with whoever came to see him. You were the only person who came to visit him that day. Out of all of his friends, no one else made the effort. He didn't tell you that, but you knew.

When he ducked into the kitchen to get some cake to eat while you guys watched the movie, you snuck over to the computer and checked his Pesterchum which he stupidly left up. He'd been getting hate messages from the bullies by the truck load. Yeah, John got bullied a lot. He didn't deserve any of it, especially on his birthday.

Angrily you minimized the window and went to sit on the couch. "Where's your dad?" you called into the kitchen.

"He's been on a business trip for the whole weekend. He's not supposed to be back until Tuesday."

It was all you could do to keep from letting your mouth drop wide open. Seriously, the fucker couldn't be home for his son's birthday? His only lonely son?

"So you've been alone all day?" you finally asked as he returned to the living room.

"It's fine. I had some nice me time. Slept in, took a long ass shower, wore pajamas all day, ate cake, practiced piano"

"Sounds real nice," you said.

"It was! What's that?" he asked, alluding to the card.

"It's just a card, you can read it later." You set it on the coffee table.

"Oh, okay!" He finally sat down by you. "So I saw a video today about skin health," he said. He was always watching weird shit like that on the internet.

"Oh yeah?" you asked. "What did you learn today?"

"Did you know that cake does wonders for your skin?"

"What? Really?"

Suddenly the piece of cake was all over your face. How could you not see that one coming? Egbert was a prank master, whatever his mood. Thank god you had shades on otherwise that shit would have been in your eyes

Your eyes! Your shades were a mess. There was no way you could just wipe them off without taking them off of your face.

"Oh, I see how it is," you muttered. He had you right where he wanted you.

"I told you I'd find a way to see your eyes eventually," he snickered. "There's no way out of this, brochacho."

"Consider this your birthday present then because I couldn't get you anything else," you said. As much as you didn't want that moment to happen, you were going to let him see your eyes that night.

He gladly helped you wash your face off. You stared at him as he wiped your face dry. He could hardly look away from your demonic red irises. He didn't seem creeped out by them, just happy. That adorable grin was kind of making your heart melt, but you tried to act like it was such an inconvenience.

But that wasn't true. You loved him so much that you actually didn't mind. And you loved him enough to sit through his horrible movies.

You had to go to the bathroom halfway through the second one. When you came back, you found John reading your card.

"It's a pretty shitty card, isn't it?" you said.

He shook his head and sniffled. "No way, this is better than da Vinci. It's kind of mushy though, even for you."

You shrugged. "I thought you might appreciate it more than a Hallmark."

He smiled and wiped his nose. "You were right about that."

"I'm still feeling pretty bad I couldn't get you anything this year."

"I know you're going through a tough time right now. It's the thought that counts, Dave. And I just want you to know, I don't really care about presents anyway. I'm just glad you're still my friend."

"I wouldn't have it any other way, Egbert."

If it was possible, his smile got even bigger.

Your phone went off just as you sat back down. It was a text from Bro. Just reminding you it was getting close to curfew. It would take a while to drive home.

"God, I should have just brought my shit with me and slept here," you muttered. You really didn't want to leave him there alone again.

"Was that Dirk?" John asked, sounding hopeful. Hopeful that it wasn't.

You nodded. "Says I gotta be home soon. Curfew."

"Oh, geez it is late," he said. "If you're going to leave now, at least let me get some cake for you to take home."

"That would be great, since I didn't get any _before_," you added loudly.

You heard him laughing in the kitchen. He got you the cake in a pretty tin foil surprise. He handed it to you while you got your shoes on and he was about to say goodnight, but you interrupted him. He was your best fucking friend. You couldn't imagine a life without him. You were NOT going to leave him in that house by himself.

"Wait," you said, "Would you wanna like stay at my house tonight? I'll even make you waffles for breakfast. Have you ever eaten Strider waffles?"

John stared at you for a moment while it sunk in. "N-no, I haven't. Uhm, would your bro be okay with that?"

"Yeah, he'd be cool with it. I'll wait for you to get your shit together if you wanna."

You'd never seen the kid run so fast. He'd have won the Olympic 100 meter the way he flew up those stairs. It made you smile. You called Dirk while you waited.

That memory was the memory you often thought of when you thought of John. It was an all-around good memory And it was one of the last you had with him.

Coming back to that present time, out on the chilly autumn hill in retreating sunlight, you opened your eyes and looked over at the gravestone inscribed with 'JOHN EGBERT'. Your voice started to break and your chest tightened up. "John, I know I say this a lot, but I still miss you so much."

It had already been ten years since the car accident. When you found out, you felt like the hands of time would never move again. Loss was hardly enough to describe what you felt. Your little John was gone, plucked out of existence by a fucking drunk driver.

It took you a long time to move forward. You cried so much, about one hundred times more than when your parents died. You hardly ate or slept, you could hardly finish out your senior year of high school. Everything was wrong without John.

You never seriously put into perspective how great he was until he was gone. Neither did you realize how much you were in love with that kid.

Oh, you loved John. So _fucking_ much. But you realized it only too late.

Rose and Jade stepped up and supported you. They forced you to do things when Dirk would just let you stay home in bed. You owed them for a lot of things, but you never really liked talking to them about stuff. The only person you talked to about stuff was John.

That's why you always came to visit his grave. Even though he couldn't answer your problems, you always felt him there listening. So you would vent your frustrations, cry, talk, throw down a rap, anything. It was the best you could do in your situation.

There was always a thought that kept you going though, even in your worst moments.

As little time as you got with him, you knew someday you'd see that John Egbert again. He'd be waiting with that priceless smile in the afterlife, and you'd spend the rest of eternity with him watching stupid movies and playing pranks on people.

It was inevitable, and you looked forward to it.


End file.
